podcast

Episode 100 marks the end of the weekly run of Calm Your Caveman. In this milestone episode, I reflect on the journey of creating 100 episodes, the mistakes made along the way, and the surprising gift of imperfection. We'll explore exercises for uncovering buried goals, examine why perfectionism keeps us stuck, and look at a powerful framework for understanding the true risks of pursuing our dreams. What if the greatest failure isn't trying and failing? What if it's never trying at all? We'll talk about: • Lessons learned from creating 100 episodes • Why perfectionism creates anxiety and paralysis • An exercise for uncovering goals buried under your fears • The three possible outcomes of pursuing any dream • Why trying and failing can still be a success • The importance of sharing your imperfect gifts with the world Stay subscribed for future bonus episodes.

Have you ever known that you felt bad, but couldn't explain exactly what you were feeling? This difficulty identifying and describing emotions is known as alexithymia, and research has linked it to higher levels of anxiety, depression, and stress. In this episode, you'll learn why avoiding emotions keeps them vague and overwhelming, how self-criticism blocks emotional awareness, and a practical technique for uncovering what you're really feeling. We'll explore: ✔ Why emotions can be difficult to identify ✔ How self-judgment blocks emotional awareness ✔ A stream-of-consciousness technique for understanding emotions ✔ Why naming emotions often reduces their intensity ✔ How emotional awareness connects to emotion regulation

Many people believe they only have two choices when strong emotions show up: suppress them or act on them. But what if there's a third option? In this episode, we explore the science of emotion regulation and how you can change emotions at their source instead of hiding them or being controlled by them. Using the story of a personal trainer whose emotional reaction cost him a friendship and income, you'll discover why emotions often feel automatic—and how to reclaim influence over them. In This Episode ✔ Why emotions can make us feel like we're being pushed around by life ✔ Why "You made me angry" isn't actually how emotions work ✔ The difference between suppression and regulation ✔ A simple 3-step framework for changing emotional responses By understanding how emotions are generated, you can learn to influence the emotions themselves and create responses that better serve your long-term goals, relationships, and well-being.

Life doesn't always unfold the way we hoped it would. Sometimes doors close, plans fall apart, and despite our best efforts, circumstances refuse to change. In this episode, I share two practices that have helped me navigate disappointment and adapt to situations I couldn't control. If you're struggling with a closed door, a lost opportunity, or a future that looks different than you planned, this episode offers practical tools for adapting, growing, and remaining open to new forms of happiness. In This Episode, we explore: • Why disappointment needs to be felt, not resisted • Why the future contains more possibilities than your mind can imagine • The surprising adaptability of human beings • A mindset shift that can help you embrace unexpected paths • Creating your own personal resilience meditation

Conflict with other people can trigger intense anxiety, anger, defensiveness, and emotional overwhelm. But what if understanding emotions could completely change the way we handle difficult people? Drawing on principles from emotion science, this episode explains why anger, fear, defensiveness, and stubbornness often make sense once we understand how someone is interpreting their situation. You’ll learn: • Why emotions are adaptive responses to perceived threats and changes • How understanding appraisals helps reduce anxiety in conflict • How curiosity reduces emotional triggering • The difference between immature and mature ways of seeing people • Why understanding others makes the world feel less threatening Understanding people doesn’t mean agreeing with them. But it can make conflict far less painful and much more manageable.

Anxiety is very good at imagining threatening futures. Hope does the opposite: it helps us imagine that something good could still happen and that we may be able to find ways to meet the demands we’re facing. In this episode, we explore the psychology and neuroscience of hope, why hope is so important for wellbeing, and one practical reappraisal strategy that can help anxious brains become more hopeful. We also discuss how the brain uses past experiences to predict the future — and why remembering that “the future is not the past” can completely change the way we respond to challenges. We explore: • Why hope is considered the opposite of anxiety • How hope affects wellbeing and goal achievement • Why anxious brains predict negative futures • How memory shapes future expectations • A powerful reframe for cultivating hope • A personal story about choosing possibility over panic

Forgiveness can feel impossible when you’ve been deeply hurt. But research shows that forgiveness is strongly connected to lower anxiety, lower depression, reduced hostility, and greater emotional peace. In this episode, we explore forgiveness through the lens of anxiety and emotion science. We also discuss the work of psychologist Dr. Everett Worthington, whose research on forgiveness became deeply personal after the murder of his mother. In this episode: • What forgiveness is — and isn’t • Why forgiveness reduces anxiety and stress • Practical exercises that help forgiveness grow • Why forgiveness is a process, not a switch If you’ve struggled with anger, resentment, or emotional wounds that keep replaying in your mind, this episode offers practical and compassionate tools for beginning the process of forgiveness without denying your pain.

Big life transitions — like losing a loved one, changing identity, or stepping into a new phase of life — don’t just bring grief. They often bring anxiety on top of everything else. In this episode, we explore how to reduce that extra layer of anxiety by understanding what’s happening in your brain, and how to work with the process instead of against it. In this episode, you’ll learn: • Why major life transitions feel so overwhelming (it’s not just emotional, it’s neurological) • What’s happening in your brain during loss and identity shifts • Why this process is so exhausting, and why that’s normal • How the emotion of awe can help your brain adapt to a new reality • How to reduce anxiety by identifying your enduring self You can’t always avoid grief or discomfort, but you can reduce the anxiety layered on top of it.

Can you medicate anxiety away? In this episode, we take a balanced, research-informed look at the role of chemical manipulation in anxiety — including prescription medications, alcohol, cannabis, beta blockers, and emerging treatments. This isn’t about telling you what to use or not use. It’s about helping you understand how these tools interact with your brain so you can make informed decisions. In this episode, you’ll learn: • Why medications can sometimes help, but don’t replace deeper work • The risks of short-term relief vs. long-term consequences • What to understand about: – Prescription anti-anxiety medications – Cannabis (including tolerance, withdrawal, and dopamine effects) – Alcohol and “hangxiety” – Emerging treatments like the so-called “anxiety vaccine”

Avoiding social situations can feel like relief…but over time, it can actually make anxiety worse. Your brain is constantly asking one question in social situations: “Do I have what it takes to handle this?” If the answer feels like “no,” you go into a threat response—anxiety, self-doubt, overthinking, exhaustion. But if you can shift how your brain sees the situation…everything changes. In this episode, I share 3 ways to do that: • Look for connections • Reduce the unknown • Accept yourself kindly

Do you feel anxious or “not good enough” when you compare yourself to other people? In this episode, I break down what research shows about how happy people relate to social comparison—and how you can shift from feeling threatened… to actually growing from it. I also share personal stories of when I felt completely outmatched, and the mental shifts that helped me move through it. If comparison has been fueling your anxiety, this episode will give you a different way to approach it. What you’ll learn: • How to stop using others as your standard • How to turn comparison into growth • How to protect yourself from social media comparison

Do you ever solve one problem…only to immediately start worrying about the next? That’s the anxiety treadmill. Your brain moves on so fast from what’s okay that you never really get to feel it. So it feels like you’re always chasing relief— but never actually arriving. The good news? You don’t have to stay stuck in the cycle. In this episode, I break down why your brain does this—and how to start stepping off the anxiety treadmill so you can actually experience the good in your life.

Feeling better might be closer—and simpler—than you think. In this episode, we explore new research on acts of kindness and why doing something for others can reduce anxiety and increase your sense of connection more than: • Planning social activities • Journaling your thoughts and feelings • Even relaxing or self-indulging But there’s a catch—kindness only works when you approach it the right way. We’ll also talk about how to avoid burnout so this powerful strategy actually supports your mental health instead of draining it. Less anxiety. More connection. A simple place to start.

What do happy people do differently—especially when they feel stressed or anxious? Most of us assume that reducing anxiety means changing our circumstances. But research shows that our thought patterns and daily mental habits have a far greater impact on our emotional well-being. In this episode, you’ll learn a simple, research-backed question that can help you: • Break free from anxious thought loops • Reduce stress and emotional overwhelm • Gain clearer perspective on what truly matters • Build habits that support greater happiness and lower anxiety This isn’t about eliminating stress altogether—it’s about learning to respond to it the way happy, resilient people do.

Your brain is constantly predicting the future. And what does it use to make those predictions? Your memories. Join me as we explore the fascinating science behind how memory shapes anxiety—and a simple practice you can use to help retrain your brain’s predictions.

If you’re trying to reduce anxiety, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed by all the advice out there. After more than 80 episodes of Calm Your Caveman, I wanted to answer a simple question: Where should you start? If I had to pick the most powerful foundations for anxiety management, these would be my six pillars: three physical habits that strengthen your brain and body, and three mental habits that shape how your mind responds to stress.

Sleep is one of the most powerful tools for managing anxiety—but it’s not just about how much you sleep. Research shows that when you sleep also matters. In this episode, we explore how sleep timing affects anxiety, sleep quality, and overall health. You’ll learn: - Why night owls often experience higher anxiety - How artificial light disrupts your circadian rhythm - The surprising role sunlight plays in cellular energy production - Practical strategies to gradually shift your sleep schedule - What to do if insomnia makes sleep optimization difficult

Feel like you know lots of anxiety tools, but can’t seem to turn them into habits? In this episode, I share four ideas that make new habits dramatically easier: ✔️ Let learning “soak in” instead of forcing it ✔️ Start smaller than you think you should ✔️ Don’t do everything—pick what fits you ✔️ Add variety so your brain stays engaged If you want your brain to respond to stress with confidence instead of anxiety, this episode gives you a practical roadmap to get there. 🎧 Listen now and take one small step.

Ever had a day where anxiety completely hijacks you—and you know all the tools, but can’t seem to use them? This episode is different. Instead of teaching something new, I walk you through how I used the strategies we’ve already discussed… on myself… during a day when I was stuck, overwhelmed, and spiraling. We’ll practice how to: Ever had a day where anxiety completely hijacks you—and you know all the tools, but can’t seem to use them? This episode is different. Instead of teaching something new, I walk you through how I used the strategies we’ve already discussed… on myself… during a day when I was stuck, overwhelmed, and spiraling.

What if one of the most powerful ways to support struggling teens isn’t trying to fix them—but teaching them how to show up for each other? In this episode, Adriana speaks with Dr. Gregory Hudnall, founder of Hope Squad, a peer-to-peer school program that trains students to recognize when a friend is struggling, listen with empathy, and guide them toward help. The program is now active in schools worldwide and is reshaping how communities think about mental health support. We discuss: - Warning signs families, educators, and peers should notice - Resources for those struggling with suicidal thoughts - Resources to help prevent suicide in those around you - How communities can create cultures where no one feels invisible

When life feels out of control, anxiety spikes. But here’s something you can control — a 3-minute daily practice that research shows can reduce rumination and depression, boost stress resilience, and help your brain shift out of threat mode. It’s called savoring, and it starts with noticing one small pleasant moment. It’s not about “forcing happiness” it’s about training your brain to notice resources — not just threats — so you can move from a stress response into a challenge response. Tiny practice, powerful nervous system shift.

Perfectionism doesn’t just push you — it pressures you. And that pressure fuels anxiety. When your brain believes your worth depends on your performance, mistakes feel like threats — not feedback. This week on the podcast: ✨ Why perfectionism drives anxiety ✨ How to shift into a growth mindset ✨ A simple practice to teach your brain that mistakes don’t define you Life isn’t a performance. It’s a classroom. 🎧

If anxiety feels like a loop you can’t escape, it’s not because you’re broken—it’s because habits take practice. In this episode, we examine a simple exercise: by reflecting on the “close calls” you’ve survived, you can exit the threat mindset and reconnect with a deeper sense of safety, perspective, and appreciation for being alive. Hear how this small daily practice can help loosen anxiety’s grip and remind your brain that you’ve already made it through far more than you realize.

Many people with anxiety unknowingly miss one of the most powerful, research-backed tools for lowering baseline anxiety. In this episode, we explore modern neuroscience showing how natural environments restore the brain’s attention system, reduce rumination, and improve executive function. You’ll learn why urban life quietly exhausts your brain, how nature helps shift you from threat to challenge mode, and why this simple habit can lower baseline anxiety all day long. Especially important during winter—when we’re most likely to stay inside.

Big projects can trigger anxiety when they feel too large to handle. In this episode, you’ll learn a simple, practical method to turn overwhelming stress into productive stress. Using a real coaching example, I walk you through how to break down big tasks, estimate time realistically, and fit demands into your actual resources — helping your brain shift from threat mode to challenge mode so you can approach what’s ahead feeling calm, clear and capable.

Feeling overwhelmed when you think about the future? This episode offers a practical two-question exercise you can use anytime the future feels overwhelming. Using two real coaching examples, you’ll learn a simple but powerful way to change how your brain evaluates demands vs. resources.